Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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