can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
