margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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