Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
My pussy is not your playground.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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