omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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