So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
