You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
