We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
