Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
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