I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
