So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
