DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
