Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
