end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize