This girl is more easily done than said...
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
My butt remains clenched, sir.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
