We're facebook friends in real life
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
