There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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