I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
