The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
