I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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