You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
