it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
