Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
