Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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