You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
