You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
