People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
