the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
