hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
this boner is exhausting
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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