He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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