i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Randomize
