Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
