Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Randomize
