Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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