can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Drunk walkin through police station. America
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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