So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
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