remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
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