I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
