So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Randomize
