She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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