I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
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