Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
