Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
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