I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Randomize
