The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize
