at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
