I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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