I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
My pussy is not your playground.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
