her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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