ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
