hotel room ftw
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
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