Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
